Friends, lovers, enemies. Improve your life by making these tiny little bundles of
pure f***ing joy.
Originally, these were a product of a carnivore-gone-vegetarian-freak-out.
Now, they’re an epic treat for anyone with a mouth. Minus our friend Joe, who
we suspect hates puppies and rainbows. Oh, and delicious food.
But I digress. These seitan bites will make hungover Sundays worth living.
Or make any carnivore graciously bow to your tasty creation.
2 cups vital wheat gluten
1 teaspoon granulated garlic
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 1/3 cups vegetable broth (let it cool)
3 Tablespoons braggs
Liquid smoke (4-8 squirts depending on how smokey. i use 6)
1 tablespoon Paprika (i like this, but you can use 1 teaspoon)
Pepper (from grinder, 4-5 grinds)
4 cups water
1/4 cup braggs
liquid smoke (very little, maybe a few squirts)
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. paprika
1/2 tsp. garlic powder
1/2 tsp. cayanne pepper
1/4 tsp. black pepper
1 cup bread crumbs
1 tsp. garlic
1 tsp. basil
1 tsp. oregano
1 tsp. paprika
1/2 cup soy milk
Mix the dry ingredients.
Once the veg broth is cool, add the wet ingredients and mix well.
Punch it and roll it with your hands for a minute ore two,
then take a ten minute break.
Beat it around some more, stretching it out a little (think play-doh but delicious) and take another 10 mins.
Heat the broth (part 2 above) and wet a knife.
Cut the crazy seiten/loaf/play-doh contraption into long strips and simmer for 45 mins.
Once complete, the most important thing you can do is drain those bad-boys.
I use 764 towels every time, along with heavy books to really drain them well.
Once you have drained most of the water (30 mins), it’s time to bake.
MIx together Flour coating and Brad coating in different bowls.
Start by coating in the flour, then dip in the milk, and then the bread coating.
Bake for 30-40 mins at 400 degrees.
Now take your fav BBQ sauce and warm it with your fav hot sauce.
Stir in those baked bites and chowwwww-downnnn.
Promise. They’re amazing.